Transcript of the vLog...
I was the Skorch Magazine correspondent at the Torrid House Of Dreams fashion show last night! Let me say right off the bat...if you want lovenati to love YOU give her free Valet Parking! Classy move, Chris Daniels.
FIDM is a beautiful school, I met Jen Wilder, an alum who offered to make me clothes. This is another way you can get lovenati to love YOU.
I wanted to sit in the front row, so I got there unfashionably early (yet not as anxiously early as Nikki McKibbin). To my delight the show was standing room only set outside under the stars in the FIDM courtyard with free booze and ample chow spreads that nobody chowed. I'm fat, you're not going to get me on camera scarfing down a pizza I don't care HOW gourmet it looks. Although, Carnie Wilson had no such boundaries, I saw her with a camera crew hovering over a plate of something probably saying how real women eat...bla bla bla. Well, my vintage polyester get up from Re-Dress was so tight that I felt the champagne bubbles in my belly. No room for hor d'oeuvres.
Anyway, the highlight of my night was telling the Dance Your Ass off girls that I was an event Dancer for their show at the Gay Pride Parade! Take a note, write it down. yes. that's lovenati with an L...thank you.
Other highlights were the lush ramblings of the HOFF praising and at the same time shaming his little girl Hayley. I'm sorry, but if my dad ever called me "stalky" in public I'd have him eaten...I'm sure Carnie Wilson would be to the challenge.
Oh! and I had no idea we were being treated to a Brooke Hogan Concert! It was amazing, she lip synced which would have been fine if I wasn't standing 2 feet away from her. Is it SO hard to find a fat girl to sing at these things? I'm just sayin...they could have called me or the Glamazons, or Frenchie, or Persia. I guess Brooke's size 12 feet were plus enough.
I met the really tall cool chick from More To Love. Anna K-K-K....Kleinsorge! We're bff's. really, she gave me her number. I'm going to see her do improv tomorrow night with Maggie Brown.
My posse - Maggie Brown, Anna Kleinsorge, Michelle Rene, Tiffany Blake, Laura Nelson Poorman, and Chenese Lewis.
hope you like my $3 torrid top I got in Chinatown at midnight from a sketchy place called the Garage. Used to be a Slaughter house.
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nati
Who doesn't love Phyllis Smith? She MAKES the Office! She kicks Office Ass! She's one of the best character actresses on television and Phyllis Lapin is a role I'd be proud to get ugly to play. But when I get red carpet ready for the Emmy's I would separate the Phyllises, put away the fuglies and get fierce. Going to Sydney's Closet might be a move I'd pull, but I'd leave the matching shawl and cheezy handbag at home. I'd also soften the hair do. The forehead that makes Phyllis Lapin so ug-tastic should get covered up so the flashes from the cameras don't ricochet and blind the paparazzi. I'd also recommend seeing what Marina Rinaldi has to offer. For a woman her age and status, she deserves to shop on Wilshire. Marina is offering some fantastic cover up pieces this season that might have set that dress off right. Or she could have called up Deb Malkin of Re-Dress to have some vintage pieces sent over, vintage is always the classy way to go!
...and that's my 2 cents.
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nati
I would like to thank UC and Moon of the most hillarious and well written Twilight blog, Letters to Rob, for giving my YouTube cover of Never Think a most hearty "YAY!"
I would also like to thank the 100 or so complimentary commenters who complimented me and even the one grumpy guy who said he didn't get through my first line (i'll win him over with cake).
I would like to dedicate this moment of glory to Jennifer Clark, my Twilight Dealer who got me hooked on this guilty pleasure. May I never quit the Pattinson.
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nati
Dude! I dig Drop Dead Diva. I didn't wanna like it. I didn't like Less Than Perfect (even though it had Will-Sasso-my-love in it, and that cute kid from Chuck). I didn't like Dance Your Ass Off (see my blog on why). I don't like things just because they're about fat girls. I support them, watch them, then trash them here at lovenati.com. So I bought the pilot, just so they'd know I tried it but didn't buy the rest cuz it sucked goat balls. I mean really?! Lifetime? It's basically the Hallmark channel.
Woah. Wait a minute. Hold the phone, negative nati. This you didn't plan on. You didn't bank on dropping tears like it was the last scene in Untamed Heart. I was truly touched by this show. I had no choice, I had to buy the season pass on iTunes. The guest stars alone make it worth $34. I admit, although I feel like Brook Elliot stole my role, I think she plays it better than I would. (wink) The whole show is a major rip off of Legally Blonde, but I don't care. Brook does the whole in-court flighty ramblings of a blonde fashionista, but I don't care. It's awesome.
At the end of the day, this show deals with amazingly deep issues with out hitting you over the head with the no-shit-stick. It's a cleaver show-don't-tell piece about the skinny girl in all of us who is learning to love the body we're in. It's not just about size, it's about life. Real life that you don't see on all-skinny all-the-time TV.
And Margaret Cho is the fuckin' bomb as the snarky legal assistant. Go. Now. Buy it.
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nati
